WELL HELLOOOOOOOOOOOO THERE!!!!

This has for sure been the longest I have not written in my blog in 3 years. I just got a financial update for December and $1500 came in above and beyond my monthly budget, which brings down the debt!!! I don't have exact totals yet, but THANK YOU for giving!

As many of you know, the mission in Belgium will be over in July. This means that if giving can stay above monthly needs by $1500/month, the entire debt can be covered!! Please keep praying about this. I was under budget in 2009 so be assured that I am doing everything I can to keep costs low. Besides car maintenance (which was over 400% of its budgeted amount), almost every other category came in under budget. Lots of new givers this month - THANK YOU for your generosity!!! May God provide for all your needs as God uses you to fulfill needs in Belgium. I counted 11 new givers - this is a lot for one month!

Christmas and New Year's flew by. I had a wonderful surprise on Christmas Eve day as Fabio surprised me from Spain at a church member's house. He stayed in town at my friend's place (set the whole thing up before he got here!) for four days. More news about this friendship will be coming soon...

Tiffany, a friend from college and camp, was here for a week around New Year's. I'll be posting pics on Facebook and hopefully here this week.

In January, after bringing in the New Year with a late-night prayer time (I think it ended at 3 am??), I left for 2 weeks in Brazil. This visit was 3-fold, but one of the reasons was to fulfill a grant with Sustaining Pastoral Excellence. I was able to visit Covenant missionaries in Rio de Janeiro for 3 days, learning about their ministries and talking theology with Wainer. Much more on all of this later... but for now, just a huge thank you for all your prayers and giving. I could not be fulfilling what God has put on my heart without you, I could not even be here without your support. Happy 2010!!!!

Random photos from the last few weeks... AND a great way to give to your favorite charity while shopping as you normally would online!!!

GIVE TO CONGO (WITHOUT CREATING DEPENDENCY) AS YOU SHOP ONLINE!!

Make goodshop.com your first stop. Put in Paul Carlson Partnership (or your favorite charity) and then use this website as a portal to go to whichever store you are planning on going to. A percentage of your purchase will go to your charity. I tried it right now - it's easy! Paul Carlson Partnership has microenterprise opportunities that are trying to stimulate economic growth and financial independence. A recent project buys a bike for someone, then they have to pay it back within about 6 months, and then another bike is given to another family who must pay it back, and so on. The bikes are used to earn a living (selling things, transportation to work, etc.)

Happy Advent! But is it really happy??? I haven't written in a while... probably because I've been up and down emotionally. December is dark and gloomy in Belgium. We've had a lot of rain. And frankly, last year Christmas (Noel) and New Year's were two of the most depressing days all year long. Even though I was with people on Christmas, I felt alone. This is the time I miss my family the most. On New Year's last year, I was sick with the flu. I stayed in bed all day, went to a prayer meeting for a couple hours, then went back to bed. I'm determined to enjoy the holidays more this year!!

As I mentioned in a recent email, I know this season is hard for a lot of people. The suicide rate is up during this season, and many people are turning to alcohol, drugs, sex and food to numb their pain. It's when we miss those who have left this earth and sometimes reflect on dreams that haven't been fulfilled yet or things we don't have that we wish we did. With this kind of an introduction, the fact that we celebrate the Light that came into the world during this time, makes it that much more incredible. The meaning found in a simple word, "Emmanuel" which means "God with us" or "Jesus", meaning "God saves" can be a stark contrast to a hurting and broken world. Knowing it, believing it and experiencing it may be three very different things, however! For me, this season is mixed. But to get out of the woe-is-me-I'm-so-far-from-family-and-friends-mentality, I have had some pretty incredible opportunities lately!!!

1) TALKING WITH PROSTITUTES: A couple weeks ago, I participated in a Serve the City event that went to the Red Light District in Brussels. With about 24 other people, we did three projects; one with battered women at a shelter, one with children, and one with prostitutes. One of my youth was with as well as a friend, so we chose the project that went and knocked on the doors of the prostitutes that work in windows in Belgium. (If they have a license, this is legal.) We tried to be a "third option" for these women. Usually, they are gawked at with lust by men or ignored by everyone else who walks by. We chose to be people who would knock on their doors and look in their eyes, treating them as human beings, with dignity and respect. We gave the women we met flyers, inviting them to come to another Serve the City even two weeks later. This was a difficult, but very interesting and rewarding project. The women we met were mostly from Bulgaria (telling me that most of them must be trafficked in... I just can't imagine that many Bulgarian women sitting around saying, "Hey, I think we should move to Belgium.") The saddest part of the day was when we told the women where to go for the event and they did not know where the metro stop was or any of the landmarks we gave them. It showed how they do not get out much because the landmarks are some of the most famous places in Brussels. (Metro Louise and Palais de Justice)

2) GIVING PRESENTS TO PEOPLE IN NEED: Last weekend, 7 students and I went to another Serve the City project in Brussels. There, we filled 110 shoe boxes with gifts for people in need. Then, with 28 women and men dressed as Santa Clauses, we went and delievered some of the boxes to women and children in a shelter for abused women and children. We also sang Christmas carols. It was a great joy to be a part of such an event. On December 31st, we will be serving meals to the homeless at Gare Centrale (Central Station) in Brussels.

3) BABY NAMED "BOSS" WAS BORN: Two weeks ago, I had the privilege of driving a family of 5 to the hospital so the youngest and 6th little person could be born. They named him Boss. I played with the youngest while his mom was in labor - 4 hours. I got to see Boss only 15 minutes after he was born! This is the earliest I have ever seen a baby. That day, I also visited other people from our church in the same hospital. We had three members there at once.

4) Upcoming Events:
December 11th - Preview of Alpha which we'll be starting in January
December 18th - Christmas party for the youth
December 20th - I'm preaching, probably on sharing the great news through friendship and service
December 31st - Feeding homeless, giving out more shoe boxes, and then having an all-night church prayer meeting

5) Books:
As I like to do, I've been trying to keep up on my reading. To increase my knowledge for helping people and couples, I read Being Latino in Christ by Orlando Crespo, (found a wonderful list of American and Puerto Rican Value System differences that could apply to almost any Western culture for the American side and can certainly apply to the Congolese and most African, Latin and some Asian cultures for the Puerto Rican side - this list helps me in this ministry context, in friendships and in my living situation!), Door of Hope by Jan Frank (book on incest), The Mystery of Marriage: Meditations on the Miracle by Mike Mason (people say this is the best book on marriage ever), Sacred Marriage: What if God Designed Marriage to Make us Holy More than to Make us Happy? by Gary Thomas, Intimate Mystery by Dan Allender and Tremper Longman III

I've recently started: The Strange History of Benjamin Button in French (L'Etrange Histoire de Benjamin Button) by F. Scott Fitzgerald, I Don't Believe in Athiests by Chris Hedges, and Dressed For Ministry by Izes Calheiros

I'm slow, but they get finished somehow...

6) Spiritually - Been feeling kind of blah. I'm in 2 Samuel which is good off and on, depending on my mood. But overall, I've been learning a lot more about how messed up David was as a father and husband (the one that's a "man after God's own heart"). I don't do it as often as I like, but I'm trying to take notes on all the chapters. After reading chapter 15 recently, I wrote, "Really messed up father/son relationships!! Resentment, anger, destruction, jealousy, power, control, neglect, unforgiveness, pride, apathy..." Yeah, we really have a tendency to make Bible characters sound WAY better than they were! God gave us such a raw picture of humanity, but we like to round off the edges and present things as all pretty and perfect. But discovering the underbelly of David's personality is pushing me to understand God's heart of compassion before a truly repentent heart. If God forgave David... then it's easier to believe God can forgive me. BUT, as a friend of mine's been pointing out, this thinking can go too far. David's behavior doesn't give us license to do as we please and THEN ask for forgiveness. The grace that we've been given requires responsibility to live as the people God created us to be. We can learn by reading about people like David - BUT his life is not meant to be an excuse for our poor choices and destructive behavior.

I went to a tea to learn more about the problem of Human Trafficking about two weeks ago. This problem is so huge and it turns out that Brussels is one of the main points for transporting people for this purpose in all of Europe.

We were given a Code of Conduct for Men in the 21st Century written by Brian Iselin this year. Maybe you'll think most of these are a no-brainer, but unfortunately this is not the case. And studies show that men who consider themselves "evangelical Christians" have some of the highest percentages of violence in their home. They may use texts from the Bible out of context to suppress and dominate the people around them. I realize that women degrade and abuse men as well. I think it is a challenge for all of us, both men and women, toward ALL people, both men and women, but this is focusing on the more vulnerable in our society. The staggering statistics show that the vast majority of this behavior is against women and children. And it must STOP:

1. I REJECT unconditionally all violence against women and children.
2. I REJECT the buying of sex with women and children.
3. I WILL intervene when I see a man beating a woman.
4. I WILL NOT beat my wife or partner.
5. I WILL INTERVENE when my male colleagues, friends, or family belittle or degrade women.
6. I RECOGNIZE prostitution as harmful to women and will do everything I can to see the end of it.
7. I REJECT the buying of pornography, recognizing it as sexual exploitation.
8. I WILL NOT BUY products that advertise by exploiting women's bodies when it has nothing at all to do with the product.
9. I WILL NOT visit clubs and bars that exploit women through 'exotic' dancing.
10. I WILL NOT BUY newspapers and magazines that advertise sexual services.
11. I REJECT all forms of sexual harassment, including wolf whistling, sexual insinuations, and unauthorised physical contact.
12. I WILL INTERVENE when my male colleagues, friends, or family engage in sexual harassment.
13. I WILL RESPECT my female colleages and partners as equals.
14. I RECOGNIZE decision-making at home is about equality and partnership.
15. I WILL ENCOURAGE other men to adopt and live by this code, including teaching it to my children.

Just went to a huge African wedding on Saturday! The women from the church had me and the other "non-African" woman dress up in African "pagne". Maman Badjee is on the right - she is from the Island of Mauritius and speaks Creole. It's amazing the two of us ever understand each other! But I am at her house every Thursday for lunch, prayer and an English lesson.

Marie Gabrielle - a French 19-yr-old who got to Belgium thanks to Covenant connections! A missionary who is now a pastor in Michigan emailed me several months ago asking if I could find something for her to do here. I sent that email to a bunch of friends working in other missions... and Assemblies of God picked it up and invited her here for a few months!

Maman Josephine and I... you can see the sign in the background, "Vive les maries" (with accent on the e of maries). Long live the couple! (bride and groom)

FAMILY!!! We had so much fun! For the Florida crowd, we're just missing Lara's husband Britt in these pics... :(

Tanya's "surprise" 40th party!!!

My niece, Brenna - SOOOOO cute!

Brenna and Duncan - I miss my niece and nephew!!!!

This piano has been in the family for 40 years, I think. I have so many memories of practicing on this piano for over 12 years.

Lara and the stray cats that eat on my mom's porch. Mom names them after famous cities - San Francisco, Gary, Nashville, etc. What? You think your family's NORMAL? :)

A night out at a French restaurant (which means really beautifully presented bird-sized portions of food ALWAYS). Great to be with my mom and sisters though!

At the Cuban restaurant by mom's house - YUM!

After preaching at Northwest Cov, I got to go to lunch with Dad, Uncle Keesey and my friend Kim!

Playing in the arboretum at Navy Pier... okay, okay, Chicago is a beautiful city! I'll admit it!

Downtown Chicago and a boat ride with my dad, brother Andy (Andrew), and his girlfriend Alice.

Reminded once again that I do not always know the difference between the John Hancock and the Sears Tower - this is the Hancock, right???

Hanging out with mom's side of the family in Crystal Lake and Wonder Lake, IL. We had a really good time!

Cody doesn't like to have his picture taken... :)

More pictures from my time in Chicago! I love my home church there - Immanuel Covenant!!

Hello All -

I am having trouble pasting my newsletter here, so I have to retype the whole thing into this space... a little annoying... :)

First of all, thanks for praying!

I cannot believe how fast time is flying. It seems like yesterday I was visiting churches in the U.S. and now it is almost November. Since getting back from the U.S., I have jumped into the weekly schedule of house visits, home prayer meetings, contacts with people who don't have a church they call home, fascinating conversations with agnostics and athiests, and youth group. I have had a few visitors come through: 1) Fabio Muniz who preached and sang at our church on a Sunday as well as at a prayer group and youth group. 2) Rosamond Smith and her friend, Brooke. Their visit was too short, but I haven't had friends from the States in a while, so it was fun to catch up and show them around Brussels.

Other news and items for prayer:

1) Conference - 7 of my colleagues are at a conference in Turkey. Please pray that it would be a rich time of fellowship and learning together about how to reach out to people with differing beliefs.

2) Worship team - We are in the process of revamping our worship team. We possibly have someone who is willing to take my place and lead, but there are some communication problems. Pray that the communication would become clearer and that all involved would be able to understand one another and move forward together in unity. I would love to give this responsibility up and concentrate on the next two points.

3) Outreach - Pray for my conversations with Eric, Samia and Elisa and our landlords Jacques and Gisele. These are the people who seem most interested in talking about life and God. I may never see tangible "results" from these conversations, but I hope that I can be used to encourage them and share my life with them as they have touched me and opened their hearts to me.

4) Youth - I am really excited about possibly starting up an Alpha Course with the youth this winter and spring. I think it is definitely time and that it is a great next step. It will also help give the students a solid base so that one of them may take over leadership in the future.

5) Raising up leaders - Keep praying that God would raise up leaders to serve our church. We have been talking about service and using gifts for many months, but the leadership team is ready to see these words put into practice.

6) Finances - I am almost ready with the most current numbers and will make a separate appeal with greater detail in the near future. Giving has been up in the last few months and this has been a HUGE answer to prayer! My mission budget was $10,000 in debt a few months ago, but then went down to $6,000. Unfortunately, though, I had to take out the next $4,000 for 6 months and so it is back up to $10,000. Please consider joining the Belgium team at $10, $25 or $50 a month or giving a one-time "booster" gift.

You may send all gifts to:
Covenant World Mission
STM Johnna Hayward
5101 N Francisco Ave
Chicago, IL 60625

There is also the option of giving electronically so you don't even have to think about it! This is very easy to set up. Just let me know if you are interested or send an email to Michele Harbeck Haley at michele.harbeck.haley@covchurch.org.

Psalm 32 meant a lot to me this week as I have been thinking a lot about identity and had some days where I felt it was difficult to feel confident in who I am as a child of God. I sometimes feel like a wild horse that needs to be broken in and trained by a trustworthy Horse Whisperer! These verses were especially encouraging - just knowing that I can hide myself in God and be instructed, taught and counseled. I don't have to know everything. I don't have to be perfect. I just have to keep moving forward and be faithful to the tasks in front of me!

7 You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. (Selah)
8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.
9 Do not be like the horse or mule which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you.

Praying that all of us may be reminded of our true identity in the One who has called us by name and is leading us day by day toward a more whole, abundant, and fulfilling life.

Happy Wednesday!!!!!
Johnna